The Crazy Things You Learn When Teaching Others

Well, God showed up in a big way.

Last weekend, I was in Central Texas to reprise a set of talks for a youth retreat based on The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis, which I wrote about in last week's Grace Notes. I know that a number of you were praying specifically for a good weekend.

It's a role I had done for this church three times before - the first time was 20 years ago (before any of the students attending this year were born!). I have also done these talks in two or three other venues. I change and tweak it every time, but a lot of the material has remained the same, including the ending - although I've never been pleased with the ending.

This year, the youth pastor of the church in Austin asked if I wanted to work in a Wormwood character (read the book!), which we had never done before. I thought it was a good idea, but I didn't really do anything with the idea until the week of the retreat. So it was a completely new element added late. I wrote in the character to ask occasional questions to open up a few topics for further discussion.

The day before the retreat, I also wrote down a vague note that perhaps Wormwood should lead a rebellion against my character (Screwtape, in essence) after the last session Saturday night. No details, just that much of an idea. Another completely new element to the script, and possibly a whole new ending.

I had never met the guy (John) who would play Wormwood until 1/2 hour before the first talk. We went over some last minute questions, and just ran with it. John did  a great job Friday night being the confused nephew and I had fun putting him down (as part of the character). Saturday morning's sessions also went well, with Wormwood beginning to ask better questions, but also starting to challenge Screwtape more.

That afternoon, we finally started to plan the actual rebellion, well after we're in this thing knee-deep. We talked to the other leaders and a couple of seniors so that they were ready to join in the rebellion. What we didn't know is how the youth would react. How many would join in? What would they say? Would those who had already been confused the first night by being on Screwtape's side break allegiance so soon after finally settling into the idea?

And still, the rebellion was not scripted - just sketched out rather roughly. It would turn out to be the most important moment of the entire weekend. (How could we have not had this ending all the other times I've presented this?)

At the end of the first Saturday evening session, Wormwood got a little mouthy, but cowered when Screwtape dressed him down. Then after the last session, his question was a direct challenge. Screwtape exploded on him (I ended up completely destroying one of the props throwing it to the ground in "anger"). With Wormwood licking his wounds, Screwtape then turned his attention to the youth. Suddenly, Wormwood finally tears off his emblem of belonging to Screwtape and stands up to him, armed with pertinent passages of Scripture, and begins the rebellion.

The entire group of youth instantly joined in the rebellion! It gave me chills! They were adding their own passages and cheering on Wormwood. The "plants" in the audience could barely be heard over the noise. Screwtape was infuriated by the rebellion, but increasingly weakened by every passage. I had some prat falls, turned over chairs, picked up a boom stand to crack Wormwood on the head, but fell short. It was bedlam! At the passage, "Resist the devil and he will flee from you" (James 4:7), I fled out the door and the room erupted in cheers. 

It was an incredible scene, only partly planned and very unscripted. It was added at the last minute, and no one person put it all together to be able to take credit. During group time, most, if not all, of the groups were connecting dots and drawing incredible conclusions. Although the planned, scripted talks generated good cabin time discussions, none of them were able to spark what happened that night.

The capper for me was that after all this happened, the youth pastor (Jeremiah) realized in the middle of the campfire talk that the two main takeaways that they had planned for the youth (being in Scripture and having accountability partners) were fully demonstrated in this unplanned rebellion scene. Screwtape was run out of the room by Scripture and by the collection of people banding together in support of one another against the enemy. Scripture, and the power of accountability partners.

Jeremiah thought we had planned to work in those two elements, and that he was so clever to have figured that out. When he drew those conclusions for the youth, it clicked for all of us that God had certainly showed up, putting together a beautiful, coordinated lesson that no one person planned. 

I retreated like a man

Last Thursday night and Friday, I was finally able to peel away for a personal retreat - 24 hours alone with the Lord and His Word at a retreat center nearby. These retreats are for turning off the world and focusing on prayer, reading, and even just resting. During these retreats, I also love to take long walks or go for bike rides, although I was a bit discouraged from that by the single-digit temperatures! I used to be in the habit of taking about one a month (plus a three-day retreat once a year), but fell out of the habit when I went back to school. I have yet to get back in the habit.

These retreats are almost always beneficial (I've had a few clunkers!) - there is a depth of relationship with the Lord that's just harder for me to experience in the midst of the hustle and bustle of life. I believe that's the model Jesus set for us when He would get away from the fray to be alone with His Father.

This retreat was by no means a clunker. I certainly could have been more focused during my time, but there were some rich times in the Word and in prayer. Some issues in life took on some good clarity, and there was just a sense of exhaling, instead of what feels like holding my breath for the last several weeks. I spent Thursday night just reading through Ezra, summarizing it, looking at the structure (which always helps me understand a book or a passage), and focusing in on his great prayer in chapter 9. You heard a little about my benefit from Ezra during the worship service on Sunday.

On Friday, it was also my goal to go through the stewardship worksheets that we've been handing out each week during our sermon series. I thought that maybe I could get some benefit from it, even though I'm the one who put the worksheets together. I was amazed at how much benefit I actually did get! I came to a lot of life decisions as a result - shifting priorities, clarifying my focus, adjusting our financial management, all kinds of good things.

One of the most important benefits is something I was already planning on talking about this Sunday, but the concept took on a far more personal, impacting, and even convicting nature during the retreat. The role of pastor's wife is difficult because it's hard to be of help when the husband simply cannot share much of his week because of professional confidentiality. Lynne and I have persistently looked for better ways for her gifts to make me more fruitful despite this limitation. The retreat yielded fruit here - one clear way that we can improve is to complete these worksheets individually, but then also  walk through our individual worksheets together and discuss them. Even more beneficial, however, will be to generate another set of worksheets for us as one flesh. Not just two full sets of worksheets, but one additional set that is for us together as a family, pulling ideas from the other two.

This is great for any couple, but I see particular benefit for a pastor and his wife. It will be a way for both of us to help the other, a way for us to draw closer together, a way to pull our "one flesh" lives into clearer focus, and to set our sights on stewarding the various arenas our lives for Christ more effectively than ever before.

I highly encourage you to do three things:

1. Complete the stewardship worksheets (or some other similar exercise to assess your life's priorities). We have copies available of all the worksheets we've introduced so far.
2. Per the message coming up on Sunday, go through the worksheets together as a couple, as a family, or with a trusted friend. Also consider coming up with a set for the family as a whole.
3. Make time at least once a year to spend alone with the Lord - away from all the noise, with nothing but a Bible and a way to journal, for no less than 24 hours. I usually have to get through at least two hours of "boredom" before I'm really ready to focus - that's just my body and mind going through "noise detox," but then finally I'm ready to meet with the Lord. Some of my richest times with the Lord have come during personal retreats (most of which started off "boring"!).

If you have any more questions about any of these three things, I'm here to help - just ask.

Retreating

This weekend is the annual Men's Retreat at Tall Oaks Conference Center. Our very special guest speaker is Pastor Bill Ross, who served as our interim pastor for almost two years (and serves as a personal mentor to me).

Years ago at a different church, my leaders and I instituted annual men's retreats (which they had not had for many years). We camped out, cooked on Coleman stoves, and had a great time discussing matters of faith and ministry. But it was at that retreat that I was able to encapsulate the value of men's retreats in just one sentence. It wasn't the material we studied. It wasn't that we had time away from the hustle and bustle. It wasn't the food (although the "Low Country Boil" and dutch oven Georgia peach cobbler were always a big hit). It was what one of the younger men said.

I asked him how he liked the retreat, and he said it was great! So, I asked him why (half-anticipating an answer that would boost my terrible ego). Rather, what he said was, "I didn't know the elders laughed." That was the most important takeaway for him. Of course, it was more than just learning the fact - it was getting to know the elders on a personal level.

I spent a lot of time with the elders, of course, and knew readily that they laughed a lot. But this very active member of the church did not. It was always business - church business - with the elders. It was never just about life and fun and joking around. All this man knew of the elders is that they were men who were serious about church business. At the retreat, he learned who they were as regular guys. That's the great value of men's retreats.

Not just that people get to know the elders in particular, but that they get to know each other outside of church business - just getting to know each other as men. That particular church, as well as Grace and many others, had lots of good fellowship ... in pockets, but not necessarily across the board. The men's retreat is about the best chance throughout the year to get to know the men of the church, especially those you don't get to spend much time with otherwise.

I'm looking forward to Bill's talks - we will learn a lot. I'm looking forward to the times of prayer, the activities, and peeling away from the hustle and bustle. But mainly, I'm looking forward to finding out each guy's individual laugh.

Real Men Don't Retreat

It's been a few years, but the men of Grace are having a retreat. In this case, real men do retreat. We have paintball on Friday afternoon, dinner and a team competition Friday night, plus some time to just hang out and talk. On Saturday: breakfast, more teaching, more food, and some unscheduled time. After lunch, we'll have time for straight talk about what men's ministries needs next.

Great thanks to Bob Simmons for all his work on getting the logistics together. Clearly, this is a far better retreat because he did this and not me. If I had done it, we'll be eating PB&J off of paper plates and sleeping on the porch. Thanks, Bob, for bringing your skills.

Also thanks to Jack Finley for getting this whole idea off the ground. He got the right people in place, got us pointed in the right direction, and sorted out big picture decisions. Again, if it had been left up to me, I would have announced the idea just three days before it was supposed to happen.

Our teaching will not consume the entire retreat. The main feature is not the teaching, but the fellowship. We want this retreat to be mostly about the men of Grace building stronger friendships ... and shooting each other with paintball guns. Somehow, those are supposed to go together. Manly men make friends by shooting each other ... something like that.

Ladies, thanks for making it possible for us to peel away. I pray that your investment will reap dividends. Would you support us even more by setting aside time to pray for the retreat?

And at the retreat, I'll explain what this picture means: