Scammed

This week, I posted something for sale on Craigslist - 4 cemetery plots that my grandfather bought in 1953. They are not going to be used by my family, so we want to sell them and let my parents enjoy the proceeds. I've listed them twice before with no success, so I dropped the price again. If this doesn't work, then I'll get a plot broker, which eats up the profit. But I really want to sell these at a decent price for the good of my folks. And that's a problem.

Within an hour of posting, I got an inquiry. Yes, they are still for sale. The person offered to send a certified check and then after the check is deposited, come pick up the title. Fair enough. But following Craigslist safety wisdom, I gave the church address instead of my home address. It turns out because of a "family emergency," the buyer won't be able to come by to pick up the title personally, but would send someone. First red flag. This person was called the "shipper." Second red flag. The longer the emails got, the more I saw that the person's grammar and spelling were atrocious. Third red flag. But I really wanted to get my folks some extra cash.

Then a full garrison of red flags. The check arrived UPS. It was not a certified check as promised, but still legitimate-looking. It wasn't made out to what I specified. The payer was not listed as the buyer, but "San Lorenzo Unified School District" (in California) without a logo or address. The check was for $100 too little. The "shipper's" name was given with an address in Tennessee, at an address that according to Google Maps doesn't exist. The return address on the package was a bank in North Carolina, but the UPS tracking showed the drop off to be in Colorado. The instructions included (of course) how to use some of the money from the check for me to send an amount by Moneygram to the "shipper" for shipping expenses (for an envelop that she was going to pick up in person?). CA to TN to NC to CO ... for cemetery plots in KC. It went from cautious to comical.

After poking around all the names and addresses, I merely responded that the deal was canceled because of the insufficient amount in the check. Then I got two more emails pushing for the deal, but clearly the second email was sent without connecting it to the first, as would happen when you're sending off many emails like this at the same time. After that, I noticed that except for the subject line of the emails, the cemetery plots were never specifically mentioned in the bodies of the emails. It was just "the item." Cutting and pasting is enough effort, apparently.

The scam didn't work. I started off cautious and never took any irrecoverable steps. Early on, I gave the buyer the benefit of the doubt, and then I just wanted to see what would happen. But I could see how someone would fall for this scam. It's because I really wanted it to be true. I wanted to be able to give something to my folks. And because I wanted it to be true, I (cautiously) went one more step than I would have otherwise. People get scammed because they ignore normal caution for things they really want to be true and take one, two, three more steps.

This is the exact same thing that happens when we surround ourselves only with news sources and social media that reinforces what we want to be true. We really want something to be true, so we listen almost exclusively to sources that tell us that it is true. And that's how we get scammed with "news," tossing our normal skepticism aside to more quickly get what we want. Then on top of that, we repost it and forward it to perpetuate it to others like the common cold. Be it politics, social justice, or religious news, we get scammed ... and we're the ones doing the scamming. Because we don't take simple steps of caution, we're to blame, not the authors of the articles. We're falling for our own scams!

This is also how we buy bad theology - someone says something that we really want to be true, so we loosen our safeguards and take one, two, three more steps into it.

How do we avoid "media-scamming" ourselves? By the same way we avoid getting scammed on Craigslist.

1. Check the details, like I checked the drop-off location of the UPS package and the return address. 
2. Know the source. I didn't know this person (or the form of English he or she used), so I was already cautious. These fake news sites are run by people we don't know and are being treated as legitimate to the point where Mark Zuckerberg of Facebook has taken some heat over it (but I still love the satirical news sites). But if they say what I really want to be true and it sounds vaguely like a news source, that's all I need to grab onto it, right?
3. Ask yourself some caution questions, such as, "Am I making an excuse to ignore a normal safeguard?" If you're looking for a way around your own safeguards, you're well on your way to media-scamming yourself.
4. Or, "Am I listening to the opposite view?", so that you can see what you want with a more critical eye. 
5. Or, "Am I too embarrassed to ask someone what they think?", because that would indicate that you probably already know deep down that you're not being cautious. 

We can prevent falling for our own media-scams in the same way we prevent falling for money scams.

This may seem harmless, but we're talking about ideas that form our actions and our relationships.

We allow people we don't know tell us what the "news" is and what it means with less caution than we use to avoid a Craigslist scammer ripping us off for money. We guard our money better than we guard our minds and hearts.

On an unrelated note, you really want 4 cemetery plots, don't you?

The Facebook Gospel

We have the "Good News" (which is what the word "Gospel" literally means). We believe that it is Good News not only for some, but for all. We believe that it is the only Good News. We believe that the only way to a relationship with God is through the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ, who took upon Himself all the justice that our sin requires, and that all who believe in Him for this will have their sin forgiven, will be given new life starting now, and that this new life will endure into eternity in the presence of God.

We believe that this Good News is so Good that others should know about it. We believe that Jesus instructs His followers to share this Good News around the world. But we seem to be having a tougher and tougher time connecting with those who don't believe the Good News is really Good News. We aren't always sure how to find a way to have an authentic, engaging conversation on things that matter. We don't get them, and they don't get us ... and then we start saying words like "them" and "us."

Now add in the noise of social media (Facebook, Google+, Twitter, Pinterest, SnapChat, etc.). Now our relationships are spread a mile wide and an inch deep. We have hundreds of friends, but we have no friends. We talk more and say less. When we get too snarky, we get unfriended - clean, cold, and final.

Maybe our solution is found within the problem.

Think about what people say via social media. They are normally commenting on things that matter to them! Things they care about. It doesn't matter if we agree with what they say! What they are telling us, in essence, is what "Good News" would look like to them. This is perhaps the most important truth about all of social media - people are telling us every day what the "Good News" would be to them.

If someone is posting (or tweeting) about something that makes them happy, then it's pretty clear what they consider to be "Good News." If they are whining about something, then it's usually not too hard to reverse engineer to find what they would consider to be "Good News." If they are just telling the world that they just brushed their teeth, then it may be hard to discern, but somewhere in this, there's a reason why they posted that - they want something, and they expect that something to bring them a little happiness. Good News.

Please don't misunderstand - the true Good News is not whatever we think might bring us happiness. It is not defined by what we consider or don't consider it to be. God defines the Good News, and it is the Good News whether we regard it or not. We can't redefine it. But daily through social media, people are giving us clue after clue after clue of what they would consider to be Good News.

And that gives us a connection point into the core of who that person is.

We can use social media to help solve the problem, rather than blame it as being part of the problem. When one of your thousand closest friends posts something, consider doing the following:

• Pray. People are telling us what they think the Good News would be for them. Pray for the person to find what they are seeking in the authentic Good News. Pray to discern well the core, God-given need that they are trying to satisfy through other means. Pray for their souls to be restless until they find their rest in God (to borrow from Augustine).
• Listen. You've been given a way to find out about someone. Ask questions. Explore. And listen - really listen. Don't judge, don't argue, don't disapprove. Just love. There will be a time for truth, but now is the time for grace. The only way to be a genuine listener is to genuinely listen (a brilliant tautology, if I say so myself).
• Identify. If you could somehow peel away the layers of what this person is talking about, more than likely you'll even find that you and he want the same thing. Peace, joy, security, love, relationship, a sense of belonging, being attached to something bigger than yourself, something. You probably have a lot in common when you get past the externals, and it's stuff that matters.
• Speak. When they know you really hear them and really care about them unconditionally, then they may be willing to listen to you, especially about this core issue. You already know they care about the core issue - it's something you agree on, and the other person obviously finds the issue to be meaningful. He told us it was of some importance when he posted about it amid the noise of social media.
• Love. First, middle, last, and more than anything else.