That's out of place, and it bugs me

What bugs you when it's out of place? A stack of books that are not aligned? Children who misbehave in the store? That dangle of hair that won't stay where you put it? Someone's sweater buttoned one off? A car that is intentionally parked to take up two spots? I'll wager that most people have at least one kind of thing that when out of place just bugs them without relief. And we are compelled to set it right - straighten the stack of books, shush the kids, clip the hair, mention the sweater button thing, or curse the selfish driver.

You could be bugged by one kind of thing out of place, but not another. For example, you can't stand the toothpaste squeezed from the middle but you find mismatched socks creative. And the thing that bugs you doesn't bug the person next to you, and that bugs you! They should be bugged by that - why aren't they?!? That bugs me.

One of the things that bugs me is when something is not logical. I'm not the all-great determiner of what's logical, and I don't always do what's logical. I am no expert, but I've learned a few things. But even before education, I was bugged when I noticed logic being violated. Not just my logic, but the rules of logic.

When someone makes a logically inconsistent statement, I notice. I can't not notice. And I'm compelled to set it right. Social media is perhaps the most frustrating, because that's where I come across the worst offenses of logic, and I have this burning need to set the logic straight. It doesn't matter if I agree or disagree with the point being made - if it violates logic, I wanna say something. I must say something. And sometimes do. And often shouldn't.

The problem with this, no matter what it is that bugs us when it's out of place, is that we can be so fixated on "setting it right" that other things might suffer. We're so bugged that we don't care who we bug until we get ourselves unbugged. For example, my quest to get the logic straight in a discussion has successfully alienated way too many people, interfered with family dynamics, and even kept me up way too late at night.

But there are a bunch of other things that are out of place that should bug me much more:

• Children without a loving home or a chance for a good education
• Human trafficking
• Systems that inhibit someone from finding work
• Discrimination, judgmentalism, and stereotyping
• Failure to stand up for one's neighbor
• Misrepresenting God and His ways

The list could go on. All of these things are out of place, but at a gut level, they usually don't bug me more than when logic is out of place. (My only hope is to realize that this is not logical.)

Are you willing to be bugged about such things at a deeper level than the pet peeve "out of place" things do? Willingness is where it begins. Then maybe we'll be compelled to set it right.

You're Not Able

I was recently talking with a friend who has a special needs child. In the last year, they have also decided to foster another special needs child who is 19 years old biologically, but not as old emotionally and psychologically. This young woman has been bounced around the foster system because few people are equipped to help her as she needs. She has been repeatedly told, "You can't, you're not able, you're not smart enough, you're disabled, someone else ... someone more capable ... must do that for you." Not surprisingly, she has come to believe what she has been repeatedly told about herself. My friend and his wife are committed to the slow process of showing her she's capable of so much more, that she doesn't need to use the "disabled" label to excuse her from flourishing as she's capable. They know this will take years and the Lord's longsuffering to be manifest in their lives.

I believe that too often in the recent history of the Western church, the same thing has occurred. Followers of Jesus have been told that they can't, they aren't able, and that someone better than they are must do it for them - the missionaries, the pastors, and maybe a few elders ... they are the ones who can do ministry, and must do it for you, because quite frankly, you don't have the training or maturity. You've been a believer for 19 years, but you're not able to perform at that level, so we'll do it for you. And not surprisingly, the Christ followers have believed to some degree what they have been told about themselves and have adopted the "spiritually disabled" label as an excuse to not engage in the ministry of the Gospel.

Just as it will take this young woman time to believe something new about herself, the same is true for any Christ follower who has bought into these untruths about himself or herself. My friend can't just tell their foster child, "You're capable" and expect her to suddenly change her self identity. Likewise, friends and church leaders can't just write an article or teach a class or preach a sermon to say, "You're capable" and expect an errant self identity to change. Patience is required to "unbelieve" a long-held untruth.

Have you been told that you are not capable, and that you need "more capable" people handle the church's mission for you? Have you bought into that untruth, even a little? Remember that the power that raised Jesus from the dead is at work in you, and that Christ is our sufficiency and qualificiation. And then embrace that it may take a while for you to shake these untruths. Look forward and see that our self-identity can change toward the truth that we are not disabled, but enabled by the Holy Spirit. And have patience for others as they embrace the same truth about themselves.

What If?

1. What if God really did create everything from nothing some time ago? Would this define my reason for being here? Would this define my relationship with Him? Does it reveal how He feels about me? Does it give Him any authority over me? Does it provide a way for me to participate in the work He is busy doing?
    
2. What if Jesus really is who the New Testament describes? If he is more than a teacher, but actually divine, equal to God the Father but somehow a distinct Person, does that put him in a unique category in the world? If he really has existed from eternity past and was sent to us, does that justify his claim to be our sole means to the Kingdom of God? If he really is "that guy," how should I respond to him?
    
3. What if Jesus really did rise from the dead? If this happened, is what he claimed during his life on earth authenticated? If he defeated death, can he defeat it for me, too? If this miracle really happened, are other miracles possible? Is anything impossible for him?
    
4. What if not doing what is God's will was as sinful as doing what is not God's will? (What if that question made sense?) What if not feeding the hungry was as wrong as murder? What if merely avoiding the big sins was categorically as sinful as not avoiding them? What if "thou shalt" was just as important as "thou shalt not"? What if not being busy with God's mission was as sinful as smoking crack? What if living in the Kingdom meant living like the Kingdom, rather than just avoiding living like the world?
    
5. What if character was more important than accomplishment? What if what people can't really see had more eternal value than the stuff they can see and praise? Am I willing to be ethically unemployed more than I'm willing to be unethically employed? If I valued character over accomplishment, would I ever lie about anything ever again? What if this statement truly had more meaning for me than just a saying that we are all obligated to agree with?
    
6. What if being good was better than being right? Would I rather win a disagreement or bless someone I disagree with? Does it make sense to turn someone away from God by how much I insist on being proven right? What if "truth" was more than just the correctness of facts, but also the attitude with which they are presented?
    
7. What if my every complaint exposed something I need to change about myself? Wouldn't it be neat if my feelings of being annoyed were a clue that there's still something within me that could improve? Wouldn't it be convenient to have a reminder that I'm selfish, I'm proud, I'm argumentative, I'm narrow-minded, I'm inconsiderate, I'm incomplete, and that I make mistakes - some feeling that would remind me of these things?
    
8. What if I didn't deserve any of the good things I have? How would I treat my stuff if I believed it wasn't owed to me? Would I hoard it? Would I refuse to be generous? Would I compare myself to others by how much of it I have? Would I brag about it? Would I define my self-worth from it? Would I forget those who have less (or none) of it?
    
9. What if I really was going to die one day? What if there really was this day when I would stop breathing, and everything about my life would be given a cosmic perspective? Would I value time? Would I spend it like a limited commodity? On my deathbed (assuming there is one, of course), would I care more about how I treated people or about what I've consumed and accumulated? Would my preferred words be "who and how" or "what and how much"? Would Right and Wrong bear any significance if I had only seconds left to breathe the air of this world? What if I knew now that one day I'll be dead? What will I be doing 100 million years from now?
    
10. What if confessing my sin was more curative than revealing only my good attributes? Is it possible that God actually forgives? If God already knows everything, is it possible that admitting it all to Him would benefit my relationship with Him? Even though the other person was wrong (too), if confessing my sin to him was the best road to reconciliation, would I do it? But isn't it a better "witness" to let people think that you think that they think that you think that you have no big flaws? Isn't it just easier to tell everyone you're "fine"?

Or maybe it's just me.

An Important Conference in Olathe on Purity

Several weeks ago, we had an important message about sexual purity. Dr. Ratliff and I shared some of the  effects, causes, and helpful resources for dealing with the epidemic of impurity that is affecting every aspect of our society, including the Church. Your comments were very positive about how we addressed the topic in a straightforward, non-judgmental way. There were a number of people who have started taking steps toward more purity in their own lives, which is fantastic news!

We don't intend to put this topic to rest. We need to talk about it frequently and in different ways. Several of you asked us to make sure we don't ignore this topic going forward. We won't.

To that end, I want to recommend to you three related conferences coming to the Kansas City area (hosted conveniently in Olathe), all on this topic of purity. These conferences are designed to address many different aspects of purity, through both plenary talks and breakout sessions. Dr. Ratliff will be one of the breakout session leaders.

The conference for men is "Men of Valor" (Jan 27 - 28), the conference for women is "Women of Virtue" (Feb 3 - 4), and the conference for both college students and youth is "Youth 4 Truth" (Jan 27 - 28). Both the men's and women's conferences include both genders for the Friday night portion of their respective conferences. The college and youth conference has different venues for each gender. You can register for any of them at http://kcmov.eventbrite.com/.


There is no one who is unable to benefit from these conferences - they are not just for those who have acute struggles in the area of purity. Purity is a topic that we all need to learn more about, especially living in a culture that is progressively more sexualized - a trend that our children will face even more strongly that we have. These events are for everyone.

Please consider attending the conference that applies to you. They are not that expensive, and well worth it.

And we won't be done with this topic after the conferences. We will continue to lift one another up in this difficult area of life.