That would be me. The Christmas hypocrite.
I hate, hate, hate the questions, "What do you want for Christmas?" and "What's on your Christmas list?" Very kind, well-intentioned people (to whom I am related, in most cases) wanting to know how to shop for me. I don't blame them. I already have my basic needs, and I'm not too picky about what I wear. I have only one hobby, and I have everything affordable that I need for that. So, I'm not easy to shop for, I know. But I'm also easy to shop for, since I'm equally as mildly-excited about really cool gifts as mediocre gifts. So I frustrate those who want to buy something for me, but I still hate those questions.
I'm not sure why I'm so messed up. I don't like to be demanding. Being selfish is bad, they say, so I try not to be. I don't like the attention of the question, or even the attention I get when opening a gift. The giver is usually more excited than I am, and my even-keeled reaction usually disappoints. "Hey, that's nice. Thanks. What time is kickoff?" I'm truly grateful, but not very demonstrative. Worse, if the gift is something I want, then I feel bad that I got it. There's got to be a disease name for this. Presentosis.
When people ask those question, I try to remember they are being nice, and yet no matter how I try, I can only manage to mumble and stutter and say nothing helpful.
But I'm a Christmas hypocrite, because I'm lightning quick to ask the exact same questions of them!
I'm admittedly an unskilled gift-receiver. But I'm a horrible gift-giver. So I ask those questions. I never have had a good idea of a gift to buy. Never. I despise shopping, and I'm uncontrollably hostile against malls (those non-sequential zoos of colorful, loud, tortuous frenzy!). Ideas I think will be great invariably end up falling flat (I get less than "Hey, that's nice" because they say lying is bad, too). Then there it is ... I've wasted yet another entire year of gift-giving, and it will be twelve long months before I can disappoint again.
So, I ask the questions in order to avoid pain for both of us - the very questions I hate to be asked and can never answer comfortably. Hypocrite, and at Christmas of all things! 'Tis the season to be sorry, fa la la la blah!
First-world problem, I realize.
Some people are great gift-givers. I married one of those. Some are great gift-receivers - so gracious, making the giver feel so good. These people are aliens to me. They come from a different world, speak a different language (called Giftonian), and collectively think that I'm the alien. Strange beasts who make it all look so easy.
I probably won't change. I'm tired of trying. To be honest, friendship is the only gift I really value.
So don't be surprised if you get burlap socks or a paint-by-numbers kit that uses Roman numerals. Whatever it is, it will be poorly wrapped and likely missing a tag saying who it is to and who it is from. But you'll know who it's from. Sorry.
Showing posts with label giving. Show all posts
Showing posts with label giving. Show all posts
Monday, December 19, 2016
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
One Tithe Fits All?
Last week, we talked about being "crazy good givers" - being the kind of giver God wants us to be as a heart issue. There were also a number of things we didn't say - we didn't recommend a percentage, we didn't suggest that you are giving too much or too little, we didn't talk about all the good things we can't do until you cough up more. We didn't talk about these things, because we have no interest in teaching giving in this way. Considering that God doesn't need anything from us, we focused on the idea that God's plan for giving is more about developing us into a more Christlike character than getting more cash in the till.
A few days later, I received a very thoughtful, respectful question about this teaching, especially the idea that I was not teaching that we should endeavor to give a minimum percentage as a tithe. Many of us were taught to tithe, and it's a discipline that helps us to give with good motives. The person sending the email clearly cares about the health of the church, the need for us to be good givers, and the negative consequences if the members of a church didn't endeavor to give a certain percentage as a minimum. I appreciate the question, the attitude, the concern, and the commitment to support the ministry financially.
I received permission to discuss this question with you.
The idea of tithe is something that was specific to the Old Covenant. The English word shows up 30 times in the NASB, and only five of those occurrences are in the New Testament. In every case, the New Testament is referring to the Old Covenant practice. The tithe was tied to the temple and to the theocratic government of Israel.
In 2 Corinthians 8-9, Paul teaches voluntary giving that flows from first giving oneself to the Lord for the privilege of participating in God's mission for the Church. No law, just liberty. (The email I received was rightly concerned about the third "L" - license, turning liberty into an excuse for sinful attitudes.)
But that's the technical, theological view, and doesn't do justice to the strong concerns behind the question I got. The questioner respectfully holds a different view, and I completely support the motives and conclusions that they been drawn as a family.
When we talk about a tithe, the most common number discussed is 10% (of total gross income). Although I'm not a proponent of a New Testament tithe in the technical sense, I think this is a great target. Not everyone can do 10%. God will lead some to give more. But as a general rule of thumb, unless you have a strong sense of God's leading, otherwise it's a pretty good, challenging goal to set for one's financial stewardship.
If members of the churches across the US would give 10%, we could easily more than double ministry here and abroad. Plus, we would go a long way in developing hearts that were sacrificial and more Kingdom-focused.
As a practical goal, something like 10% minimum is a fine practice. However, I still choose to avoid the term tithe, and encourage every family to prayerfully, submissively consider what God would have you do. Read 2 Cor 8-9 carefully and determine to the best of your ability what kind of giver God wants you to be. And remember that generosity is not measured by quantity or by percentage, but in Christlikeness of one's attitude and actions (2 Cor 8:9).
There are several good articles on the topic at http://bible.org/topics/367/Tithing and http://bible.org/article/financial-faithfulness.
A few days later, I received a very thoughtful, respectful question about this teaching, especially the idea that I was not teaching that we should endeavor to give a minimum percentage as a tithe. Many of us were taught to tithe, and it's a discipline that helps us to give with good motives. The person sending the email clearly cares about the health of the church, the need for us to be good givers, and the negative consequences if the members of a church didn't endeavor to give a certain percentage as a minimum. I appreciate the question, the attitude, the concern, and the commitment to support the ministry financially.
I received permission to discuss this question with you.
The idea of tithe is something that was specific to the Old Covenant. The English word shows up 30 times in the NASB, and only five of those occurrences are in the New Testament. In every case, the New Testament is referring to the Old Covenant practice. The tithe was tied to the temple and to the theocratic government of Israel.
In 2 Corinthians 8-9, Paul teaches voluntary giving that flows from first giving oneself to the Lord for the privilege of participating in God's mission for the Church. No law, just liberty. (The email I received was rightly concerned about the third "L" - license, turning liberty into an excuse for sinful attitudes.)
But that's the technical, theological view, and doesn't do justice to the strong concerns behind the question I got. The questioner respectfully holds a different view, and I completely support the motives and conclusions that they been drawn as a family.
When we talk about a tithe, the most common number discussed is 10% (of total gross income). Although I'm not a proponent of a New Testament tithe in the technical sense, I think this is a great target. Not everyone can do 10%. God will lead some to give more. But as a general rule of thumb, unless you have a strong sense of God's leading, otherwise it's a pretty good, challenging goal to set for one's financial stewardship.
If members of the churches across the US would give 10%, we could easily more than double ministry here and abroad. Plus, we would go a long way in developing hearts that were sacrificial and more Kingdom-focused.
As a practical goal, something like 10% minimum is a fine practice. However, I still choose to avoid the term tithe, and encourage every family to prayerfully, submissively consider what God would have you do. Read 2 Cor 8-9 carefully and determine to the best of your ability what kind of giver God wants you to be. And remember that generosity is not measured by quantity or by percentage, but in Christlikeness of one's attitude and actions (2 Cor 8:9).
There are several good articles on the topic at http://bible.org/topics/367/Tithing and http://bible.org/article/financial-faithfulness.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Don't Buy Me Any Gifts This Year
I'd rather not receive any gifts this year. Seriously.
God has provided everything we need, and work to cover future needs. For now, we have no unmet material needs. That might not always be true, but this year, it is. And we're grateful.
For this year, I would rather my friends and relatives bought some rice. Or maybe a soccer ball. Or little shoes. Or just some ugali. What would thrill me more than a gift-wrapped box is donation to hungry4HIM Ministry (http://hungry4him.com), which supports the Friends of Christ orphanage in Ahero, Kenya. There are almost 300 orphans at FoC, and little donations go a long way. For example:
If you would like to provide a Christmas gift in this way, just write a check to "Hungry4Him", put "Christmas fund" in the memo line, and send it to:
Hungry4Him Ministry
427 Airport Road
Dublin, GA 31021
Hungry4Him is in process of putting together a Christmas "catalog" to promote this kind of giving, but I'm just getting the word out early.
Or, there are many other ministries that have the same kind of fundraiser - giving gifts to their ministries in lieu of giving one another gifts (often times, gifts we really don't need anyway). I encourage everyone to think about this as a gift-giving idea, for whoever you would buy gifts for.
I would love it if this practice eclipsed "Black Friday" in the amount of money raised.
God has provided everything we need, and work to cover future needs. For now, we have no unmet material needs. That might not always be true, but this year, it is. And we're grateful.
For this year, I would rather my friends and relatives bought some rice. Or maybe a soccer ball. Or little shoes. Or just some ugali. What would thrill me more than a gift-wrapped box is donation to hungry4HIM Ministry (http://hungry4him.com), which supports the Friends of Christ orphanage in Ahero, Kenya. There are almost 300 orphans at FoC, and little donations go a long way. For example:
- You can provide a 5 lb. bag of rice or beans for about $3.
- You can provide a 5 lb. bag of maize for about $5 (20 lbs. would feed the entire school for one meal).
- You can provide a chicken for $5 or a fish for $3.
- 6 pair of socks cost about $2, and a blanket for $6.
- Toiletries? 15 bars of soap for $3 or 10 toothbrushes for $5.
If you would like to provide a Christmas gift in this way, just write a check to "Hungry4Him", put "Christmas fund" in the memo line, and send it to:
Hungry4Him Ministry
427 Airport Road
Dublin, GA 31021
Hungry4Him is in process of putting together a Christmas "catalog" to promote this kind of giving, but I'm just getting the word out early.
Or, there are many other ministries that have the same kind of fundraiser - giving gifts to their ministries in lieu of giving one another gifts (often times, gifts we really don't need anyway). I encourage everyone to think about this as a gift-giving idea, for whoever you would buy gifts for.
I would love it if this practice eclipsed "Black Friday" in the amount of money raised.
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